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Schedule a family meeting -

If possible, bring the family together with the older person. Discuss what they need, who can help, and in what ways. Have the meeting by phone or video chat if that's easier.

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Summarize your agreement in writing -

Keep in mind that family difficulties are typical. You may need to bring in a family therapist or social worker to help with the meeting. 

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Discuss legal and financial issues -

These topics are difficult, but they help ensure that the older person maintains decision-making authority. Preplanning will also lessen family disagreements.

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Make sure there's a will -

In the will, the older person decides how to dispose of assets after death.

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Ask the older person to appoint a power of attorney -

Power of attorney gives a caregiver the authority to act on behalf of the older person if they're unable to do so.

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Have an estate-planning document -

An estate-planning document allows the older person to transfer assets and avoid various legal problems.

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Choose a primary caregiver -

The job of a primary is to make sure that the older relative is getting the care they need. They look at the big picture and make sure all bases are covered. 

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Caregiver burnout -

To avoid caregiver burnout, consider taking turns being the primary caregiver, if possible.

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Get organized -

Keep track of important information in a care log, accessible to everyone in the family.

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Hire a geriatric care manager -

A geriatric care manager is usually a licensed nurse or social worker who specializes in the care of older people. They work with the elderly and their families to identify needs, make a care plan, and find services in the community. 

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Share responsibilities among family members -

Take turns visiting and taking care of chores for your older relative. Family members who live far away can still help. For example, they might be able to pay for a weekly housekeeping service or another type of help.

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Adjust your plan of care when necessary -

As the person's needs may change and helpers will come and go, keep in mind that your care plan may need to be altered. Use your care log to deal with changes.

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Take care of necessary paperwork -

Find all legal, financial, and insurance documents, including birth certificates, social security cards, marriage or divorce certificates, and wills. Identify bank accounts, sources of income, and insurance papers.

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Keep the paperwork safe -

Review these documents for accuracy and update them if necessary. Store them in a secure place, such as a safety deposit box or a fireproof box. And don't forget to make copies. 

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Identify your informal network -

Ask for help from people in the older person's community, such as relatives, neighbors, longtime family friends, and members of religious and social organizations.

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Have emergency medical information on hand -

From names of doctors to lists of medications, make sure all the important information is accessible should a medical emergency arise. 

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Know which hospital they prefer -

Find out if your relative has a preference when it comes to emergency medical facilities. Then make sure anyone who might end up accompanying them knows where to go.

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Be prepared to commute -

Keep your car in good repair, and check the weather before traveling. You might also want to keep a travel bag packed with toiletries and essential clothing to grab quickly in case you're called upon suddenly. 

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Consider disclosing your trip as an emergency -

Expenses can quickly pile up when you have to travel often. However, you may get a discount when buying bus or train tickets if you disclose that it's an emergency. 

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Get them an easy-to-use phone -

A special cell phone designed just for seniors may be easier to use than a regular smartphone.

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Beware of exploitation and scams -

Unfortunately, seniors are often targets for financial exploitation. Keep an eye on the accounts for unexpected or unexplained withdrawals. 

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Have someone check food storage areas -

The older person may not be aware when food has spoiled or passed its expiration date. Therefore, the refrigerator, freezer, and pantry should all be checked on a regular basis.

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Tap into the aging network -

Contact the local department on aging in your older relative's community. They can help you find helpful services.

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Continually assess safety and independence -

Ask your relative, and any others involved with caregiving, to report any difficulties with daily activities, such as preparing meals, laundry, or bathing.

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Trust a neighbor with a spare set of keys -

Exchange phone numbers with this neighbor and give them a set of keys. Contact them if you suspect something is wrong. 

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Assign an emergency contact on the ground -

Whether it's a relative, friend, or professional care manager, find someone local who can take responsibility for your loved one until you can be there. 

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Use remote surveillance technologies -

Obviously, any surveillance technologies should only be installed and used after receiving permission from the person in need of caregiving. 

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Take care of yourself -

Caregiving in general can be very tough. Don't forget to make time for yourself, set limits, and allow others to help.

Sources: (WebMD) (Healthy Aging) (National Institute on Aging) 

See also: The biggest myths you may believe about aging

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